Here’s a question I’ve been grappling with for years: in this world of electronic ubiquity, where technology gives us more, better, closer, faster, louder, high-definition access to information, music, images and video, why is the hardware so damn ugly? I don’t need more terabytes of data. I don’t want an even bigger screen with high-fidelity surround sound and wireless GPS. All I want is something that doesn’t make my living room look like the bridge of the USS Enterprise.

 

Option one is to keep it all somewhere else, like the study. But if you are using your computer to run the stereo or if you like to keep an eye on your children’s surfing by keeping the computer in a family area (see Netsafe’s recommendations ), you have no choice but to make the best of an ugly business.

 

First, go wireless. Even better, go virtual. I particularly like the Itech Bluetooth Virtual Keyboard , which is roughly the size of a cellphone and projects a keyboard on to your work surface. Not only is it unobtrusive when not in use, it’s also way cool. Buy it from Amazon if you can’t find a local supplier and really impress the Luddites. Unleash your mouse while you are about it. A silver-plated wireless mouse with Swarovski crystal eyes and ears is sure to raise the tone.

 

Next, minimise the monitor. Even a flat screen will still dominate the room but you can turn it into a digital picture frame, which helps somewhat (instructions here) or you can use your TV as a monitor  – at the very least this reduces the number of screens cluttering up the house.

 

That done, you’ll want the deskless cordless mouse with an 80-metre range from Weramouse.com so you can flop around on the sofa as you surf. EcoGeek showcases the state of the art in wooden monitors. These may or may not be a more harmonious addition to your rustic decor, especially when teamed with the matching mouse and keyboard. Very green.

 

And then there’s the computer itself. From plushdepartment.com comes Pure, maker of ceramic works of art that also happen to be computers. Catering for every taste there’s white on white, gold-plated, urban art or genuine Delft no less. Wow. Dell has released the very elegant Studio Hybrid PC with six coloured sleeves and a bamboo option. Their Studio laptops can only be described as hip (not a word commonly associated with computers) and would look great in any room. As would the Double Happiness “digital clutch” designed by Vivienne Tam for Hewlett-Packard  – particularly if you are short of space.

 

Sadly though, if you want stylish computer hardware the choices are still limited. Which is why a new art form is erupting – the art of mods. Mods are off-the-shelf components, modified to taste. Think pimp my computer, then take a look at neatorama.com for inspiration. My favourites are the steampunk mods from datamancer.net.

To understand steampunk, visualise industrialised Victorian Gothic colliding with modern technology – valves, brass, copper, old typewriters, stained glass and marble. Yes it’s expensive – what on earth did you expect? If you want to see how hard it is, try it yourself. You’ll find instructions for a simple version here . Good luck!

 

Notice something different about this column? It’s full of tinyurl addresses. No, it doesn’t mean that I’ve been too lazy to visit more than one site this month. Tinyurl is a clever way of shortening very long web addresses (urls) so that you don’t have to type in super long strings of characters. For example, when you want to reread my January column online (it could happen!) instead of typing in www.nzhouseandgarden.co.nz/Articles/VirtuallyThere-January2009.asp, you can type in tinyurl.com/cg6t3z and be directed to exactly the same place. Finally, technology that makes surfing simpler. I hope it helps.